AN IRISHMAN has been pranking high-end British department store Selfridges by ordering Nutella jars with rude words printed on them – and claiming they are Irish names.
Seamas O’Reilly, 30, from Derry city has so far managed to get the upmarket London store to print ‘Arsemuck’, ‘Bumgravy’ and ‘Backdirt’ on the hazelnut spread jars the store personalises for its customers for £4.99.
The witty writer and musician shared this monologue of one of his interactions with a salesman in Selfridges…
Guy: “Sorry you can not have this one.”
Me: “Excuse me?”
Guy: “This one.”
Me: [Stares quizzically]
Guy: “Is a rude one. Sorry.”
Me: “Oh, right no, wait! Sorry, do you mean because of Arse?”
Guy: (Nods sheepishly).
Me: “No, ha, Arsemuck is an Irish name.”
Guy: (embarrassed) “Ohhhhhhh.”
Guy: “I’m sorry sir.” (Laughs, wraps package and hands it to me)
“I’d heard people were having trouble getting certain names [printed on products], like your woman in Australia whose daughter was called Isis, and I thought maybe they wouldn’t know if I tried more silly, Irish words,”Mr O’Reilly told The Irish Post.
“It’s not big or clever but if comparing a thick, brown, creamy foodstuff to human waste is wrong then frankly, I don’t want to be right.”
This is not the first time Irish people have had to fight to get their chosen names on personalised jars – one Irishman was refused his surname, MacManus, by Marmite – as it had the word ‘anus’ in it.